Stratford Shoe Store Fire Audio Disaster by RadioActive

This one is for anyone who ever worked in a radio newsroom.

My very first paying gig in radio came at a news service out of CKEY Toronto, a competitor to what was then called Broadcast News. We used to feed out news clips known as “actualities” and voicers to affiliates across the country.

Most were in major cities, but we also had a lot of small markets and we were told to take in anything they sent us, regardless of how bad it was, in order to encourage stations to send us material for the network.

One day, a guy from CJCS Stratford called with a breaking story he thought we just had to know about – a fire at a local shoe store. Why he thought that would be of interest to anyone elsewhere in the country is beyond me, but we were under orders to take the feed in anyway.

What followed was a hilarious example of distortion and stupidity that was so bizarre, someone saved it for posterity. But be aware that it’s the contributor’s final short sentence at the end as he finishes the feed that serves as an unintended punchline that you couldn’t possibly write.