Quitting by VULPIS

just some thoughts I've been having recently

beat by the vibey af: https://soundcloud.com/xmittens

Lryics:

I Think I’m bout to quit,
I’ll put my rhymes back on the shelf,
lock my songs up in a cell,
and say it's only for my health.
And if I get retaliation, where demands are being made,
makin it pretty clear they love my inconsistent dedication;
I’ll say it’s all okay, fact is that my heart just isn’t in it.
Inefficient with relation to creation or a sentence.

Jumbled mess of thoughts who’ve gone out for greener pastures
Chasing bigger chapters,
turning leaves for finding answers.
And I can’t seem to justify writing songs for vacant fans,
preach to empty concert halls, and get applause from ghastly hands.
And what's the use in even trying?
a couple years and I’m still writhing.
Shoving meaning in my writing
and then pen it when I’m crying?
Yeah, I’m done…

At least for now or maybe longer,
the feeling hasn’t left, so perhaps I ought to ponder;
take my leave from weaving stories
find a love for brewing coffees,
exercise my body,
or reattempt to learn karate.

Finally score a lovely date
I think I have a lot to offer,
when I’m not playing games
I’m super into nerdy culture.

I guess I want adventure,
Not the box I seem to live in.
It’s cozy but I’m nosey
I need to breathe a little action.

And I think it’s fair to say I tend to struggle with acceptance,
of my flaws and my skills I still weaponize my lemons.
Asking questions out to life, like how you make you make your lemonade?
When I was young I learned from Cave to make them into fruit grenades.

And I’m still throwing fire bombs at anything I want to make,
Stressed out over life and strife that it creates.
I need to change my mindset to be okay with being stable.
Take off nostalgia shades and leave my longing at the table,
but that’s easier said than done when I waltz around my past,
and miss the times I had and the way I used to laugh

So in the interest of it healing I’m saying my farewells for now.
goodbye and adios I hope your life continues well.
Jā ne, dosvidanya but it’s time to close the show,
I’ll see you once again as soon as I can learn to let it go.

I’ve been waiting for the day that I can live my dream.
But now It’s too late so pardon me I just have to let it be.
And maybe one day I’ll be able to retry from scratch,
but I’m sick of chasing them because they never seem to last.

ooohhh ohhh