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Three20: The TRUE Story
20 years ago, in a highly guarded secret compound north of Uzbekistan, two FBI scientists, Dr Fabio and Dr Grooverider, attempted a controversial experiment that would change the face of history forever.
As instructed by the overlord, Lord Massive Smiling Rave Face, they were about to create something no human brain could possibly decipher into a functioning reality.
The plan was simple: to create a dildo that had the power to bring down rogue forces by the simple use of vibration; the dildo would be placed upon a rocket which would then be launched into the back passage of leaders, causing them to be pleasured to such a massive extent that it would blow their brains out, and bring them and their fascist beliefs crashing down.
However, Dr Grooverider was viciously attacked by a herd of Amen and Think Breaks, leaving him mentally and physically disfigured. After seeing his friend in such a state, Dr Fabio decided that he should seek revenge, and made it his life ambition to create a pair of robots that could combat these Breaks.
After 7 years of secretive hard work, and many questionable magazines and internet sites, they finally created two robots that would change the face of the world forever.
Initially, they decided to name them Bob
McPoopy and James Cocknose, but after programming the names in, the robots malfunctioned and killed them both. Luckily, as they were playing CoD, they respawned in a nice position away on the other side of the map.
After a few kill streaks and remote controlled cars, they recreated the robots to perfection; this time they named them Nicholas Dyke and Rama Hill, and it was at this moment Planet Earth changed forever.
However, Nicholas started humping Dr Fabio's leg and Rama created lethal bombs of bogey by picking his nose; to calm the robots down, Dr Fabio whipped out the Wand of William Cartwright and unleashed the Spell of Sigma, blowing the robots apart.
After this they decided they couldn't really be arsed and rang up two wasters from England and told them to make good music to distract everyone from what just happened.
So we did.