Damn Slunk by derrek published on 2018-01-28T05:37:30Z My new album Damn Slunk™ is the bestselling sequel to my first album, Virtual Salamander. This isn't an album actually I lied. It is the second part of Phase 4 of my plan to steal all the ketchup in the world. "Why would I want to have all the ketchup in the world?" you may be asking yourself, or perhaps "How does releasing one of the greatest albums of the decade help you acquire such an absurd amount of ketchup?". Well I will be answering both of these questions right now hahahaha. OK so get this; I make thousands of dollars making meaningful investments in stocks and use the money to relocate to antarctica, freeze hundreds of ketchup bottles into ketchup bricks using the cold climate of the area, and a construction crew. I then commission the construction crew to use the bricks to make a humble house out of ketchup bricks. Over the next two and a half years I rent out rooms of the house with a service similar to Airbnb. Three years later the house will melt due to global warming, resulting in a sizable pile of ketchup. I will use the money raised by the Airbnb to host a massive potluck and when people want ketchup on their food they just go to the ketchup pile in the middle of the party and dip their food in it haha. Genre Rasin Editor Contains tracks Peeper Piper Pizzas by derrek published on 2018-01-28T05:37:29Z Herpes Slurpees by derrek published on 2018-01-28T05:37:27Z Dorgan Owner by derrek published on 2018-01-28T05:37:26Z Five Miles Per Flower by derrek published on 2018-01-28T05:37:24Z I Drink Nail Polish for Breakfast by derrek published on 2018-01-28T05:37:23Z
