The Elephant Song / Cân yr Eliffant by Simon Ager

This is a silly little song I wrote in March 2012 when contemplating the phrase 'the elephant in the room'. It's about taking metaphors too seriously.

This recording was made in November 2017, and is played on the baritone ukulele, kazoo and shaky egg. The photo is one I took of the elephant hand puppet that lives in my living room, although we don't mention her.

Here are the lyrics:

There's a matter we must discuss
But I don't want to make a fuss
It's an issue we must address
But I don't want to cause any stress.

There's an elephant in the room
You've noticed, I assume
She's rather large and grey
And getting in the way.

It's so obvious to me
Oh why you can't see
We need to sort this out
And there's no need to pout!

Now the elephant's in the hall
Painting pictures on the wall
Of dragons and ships and trees
And great big bumblebees.

We must find a way
We can't let her stay
I'll go and call the zoo
To see what they can do

Now the elephant's on the stairs
Playing scrabble with the bears
Who live under chairs
And like to wear blue flares.

The zoo say they can give her
A nice place to stay
And we can go and see her
And we never have to pay.

Now the elephant's in the zoo
Making friends with the kangaroos
And delighting all the kids
By juggling dustbin lids.