Remember the good old days in Tinsel Town, when a love story was a love story and lust and violence of an extraordinary nature were kept out of the theaters and simply out on the streets? :) Oh, wait - Hollywood INVENTED lust and violence of an extraordinary nature, in the last twenty years as they clamored for more and more money, growing impatient to find beautiful scripts celebrating the spirit of love, loss and longing so prevalent in reality - you know... real life. ;)
This song attempts to capture that bygone Hollywood era of excellent writing, the irrepressible spirit of love and the unique collaboration that insures a classic!
THE BIG PITCH (the original script)
I’d have a hard time writing the lines for the show without you.
The other screen tests that I’ve performed don’t even compare, ask the crew.
Ya, the cast, and the crew, and the writer...they all miss you, too.
And the audience says that another co-star just won’t do.
You know the light turned green when I pitched a project about us.
I said I’ve got a story about artist’s block, God, love, truth and trust.
He meets a small town woman who knocks his block off, it’s true,
because that small town woman,she looks, walks, talks....ya, and tastes just like you.
Then she leaves and he grieves, but some right-brained revelations he receives,
as he prays...and his hands, voice and mind express his love in ways,
that she just can’t resist as she sees God’s will in all of this.
The producer said, “Can you verify that this story is true?”
I told him all the elements are in place, except you.
He said, “Whatever it takes to sign her, give it a try.
And if you’ll acquiesce the top billing, perhaps it’ll fly.”
So, pick the props, choose the set, and we’ll do a scene you won’t regret.
Take your time with the lines, the producer’s not imposing fines.
The writer says he can’t end the script without your approval;
and there’s a clause in the contract that strictly forbids his removal.
He needs the plot resolved with assurance that you’ll come back at the end.
There’s so much pain in the world today, that’s just the message he wants to send.
Two acts in, sitting there, the whole audience will start to care.
So, what else can he do? He refuses to break their hearts, too.
I think we’ve got ourselves a commitment except for one catch---
unless you’re in the package, the leading man’s not attached.
They want a meeting soon to decide what we’re all going to do.
I’ll have the biggest pitch of my life then and this one's to you.
So write the end, script it fast, in L.A., these love things never last.
Bond the crew, rent a town.... before we go in to turnaround. :)
"L.A. Cowboy? Mr. DeMille's office calling... your scripts been approved!"