How much does love hurt? What is worse? Why do we endure it? How do you express so much, deep, searing pain? Once you’ve suffered it, are you not scared of surrendering to it again, of exposing your frailty? Do you not feel that fear?
Where did that simple, pure, crystal happiness go to? It was lost a long, long time ago. Surely it’s still there inside somewhere, crying to get out… to save you.
So? It’s strange, but isn’t everything if you don’t welcome it, embrace it and try to understand? Is it so wrong loving the alien?
WHEN I WAS NOT THERE
I did not do it. I did not go there. I am not guilty. I am so, so sorry… but what for? You tell me!
SHUT UP AND LISTEN, for fuck’s sake!! Why did you come here, then? Don’t you realise how hard this is? How hard I’m trying? I’m talking, singing, crying, wailing, shouting to you, giving you everything. Show some respect!!!
Life is a prison only if you let it contain you. We are the gatekeepers. I will not be restrained by fear, chains, locks, bars, walls, fences, paranoia or you. Go on, leap with me. There, is it so perverse? Don’t you wish you’d done it years ago?
You are gone and you took everything you could imagine… heart, light, air, touch – oh yes, touch! But there is still my love and that cannot go with you, it is for better things and I will devote it all to them.
I need no help to hallucinate, to journey inwards and beyond. I can bend my own mind. This is what it looks like… do you like it? Can you take it? Will you ever come down?
Alone, in the spotlight, thinking as I talk, “I’m a piece of wood”, “I’m a grain of sand”. What are you? Do you ever even think about it? I have to, all the time. I never stop explaining it to myself out LOUD! I’m baring it all to you. Big, isn’t it? Feed it!
If you have nothing to fight for you will fall because you have nothing to believe in. If you know there is a better way, that your forefathers knew was the only way, that bonded you to the universe, why would you stand by and let fools shape you to fit their tiny world? The fight they fight inspires me. They fight to the last.
THE JUMP OF THE CLIFF
Do you never feel the urge to plummet? Did you never dream of falling? Do you like it? Do you want someone to save you? Oh, the release!
Contract: shrink, shrivel, reduce, retire, crouch. I will not be controlled by paper and blue serge and silk. Law is either human or it is lawless, corrupt, festering, rotten, fetid. Success is the antithesis of surrender, system, society. NOT ME, MATE! NOT ME! NEVER!
Like I mean it. Like you meant it? Like you cared? Like you even raised a little finger to help. Well, here’s my middle finger. Thank you very much!
If you are a sheep, you cannot bleat Mayakovsky and expect understand him. You must resist, be reactionary. Sculpt your own self with experience, energy, self-will, anger and love, your bare hands and your open mind. Then, perhaps, you can awaken, hear him, feel him and cry out to him, “Vladimir! Free me.”