Need a gift for a gifted musician?
Joe Vor-Tech, also known as "The Masterful One" was created in an underground club kid lab in NYC’s infamous Tunnel nightclub, where he was installed as Grand Visicount. Eventually a magic princess set free of his bounds and led him back to the Borough of Brooklyn so that he could forage for his natural foodstuffs such as Jamaican beef pies and $4 hero sandwich/tropical fantasy cola combos. At some point he somehow became a DJ, playing hardcore breakbeats in BK’s underground with the Machinati Tribe. Once raver-gang-war became passe he traded in his wide legs for "guyliner" and an a-symmetrcial hair-cut and started playing the electro we all loathe him for today. Things were going swimmingly for him, playing alongside such acts as 2 Many DJs, Larry Tee and Fischerspooner, so he, inexplicably, decided to move to Chicago because he has a fetish for cheap rent.
Joe has played throughout the east coast, from Rhode Island to Miami, at Ontario’s Teknival, and throughout the Midwest. He has since headlined for Drop Bass Network in Milwaukee, DC Productions in Minneapolis and a whole bunch of dance clubs that, let’s face it, are really pretty inter-changeable. He’s done remixes for Houston Bernard, Yellow Note, Lady Gaga, Gucci Mane and I think some other people he’s forgetting. He thinks the present day nightlife scene is boring but that’s probably because he makes his living off of it unlike you filthy, illiterate masses, yes you know who you are, and no, I won’t lend you any money.
Today Joe likes to pretend it’s the 1890s, read about quantum physical theories you’ll never understand and preen himself in the mirror. He also, for reasons I really can’t explain, swears he’s actually a cat and you all just think he’s a person. Joe is a 32nd degree Freemason and thinks Carson Daley is trying to steal his girlfriend from him. Go figure.