*UPDATE* I'm a finalist! Enjoy ... and VOTE FOR INGRID until Noon (PST) Thursday, December 17! http://hightechdad.com/htdhpv

I'm hoping to win a FREE HP TouchSmart 600 from @HighTechDad ... and let me just say this; I have found his blog and reviews helpful ... so free to follow/subscribe/etc. He does often have giveaways (though I rarely have time to do those sorts of things), if you like that kind of bonus! @HighTechDad on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/hightechdad

Yes, I REALLY want to win. No, I won't tell the sob stories like others (or offer bribes or hawk my children) ... it is the holiday season! There's enough to be sad about already. All said, I had fun regardless of the outcome. Enjoy the song!

YOU'RE A LEAN ONE, OLD PC

You're a lean one, Old PC.
You've lost all your appeal.
Your motherboard's a cactus,
Your OS is an eel.
Old PC.

You're a bad banana
With a greasy gigibyte peel.

You're a monster, Old PC.
Your hard drive's an empty hole.
Your brain is full of spiders,
You've got viruses in your soul.
Old PC.

I wouldn't touch you,
with a thirty-nine-and-a-half foot widget pole.

You're a vile one, Old PC.
You have termites in your drive.
You have all the computing sweetness
Of a seasick crocodile.
Old PC.

Given the choice between the two of you
I'd take the seasick crocodile.

And your router, Old PC.
Can't connect your sinful dots.
Your network's a dead tomato splot
With moldy purple spots,
Old PC.

You're a three decker software and hardware sandwich
With arsenic sauce.

You nauseate me, Old PC.
With a nauseaus ASCII-naus.
You're a crooked jerky jockey
And you drive a crooked horse.
Old PC.

Your C-drive is an apalling dump heap overflowing
with the most disgraceful assortment of deplorable rubbish imaginable,
Mangled up in MFT knots.

You're a foul one, Old PC.
You're a nasty, Windows skunk.
Your hub is full of unwashed socks
Recycle bin's full of gunk.
Old PC.

The three words that best describe you,
are, and I quote: "Stink. Stank. Stunk."